Do you want to change your life? The secret is to rewrite the tales you say to tell yourself. We often tell ourselves that there are things we are good at and things we are not good at. This becomes a self-satisfactory prediction. You often say that you are not at all good with money and you are also sure enough about the fact that financial freedom avoids you. A lot of our confidence comes from the way we talk to ourselves. On the other hand, a lack of trust comes from our inner monologue. Here are some steps to change your life. Most of them may surprise you.

Your Narrative with a Growth Mindset

A growth mindset is a mindset where we see defeat as an opportunity to expand and learn. On the other hand, a fixed mindset is a mindset where you believe in the fact that there is nothing where you can upgrade yourself. It is also said that people can’t change. You are stuck with your faults and failure is a sign of weakness. People with a fixed mindset will say, “Just the way I am.” Instead of stepping out of their comfort zone to learn and grow. Changing the story means grabbing the possibility of learning new things. You are not restricted by what you have done in the past and you can also handle the discomfort of experiencing something new.

Understand the Origin of Your Internal Narrative

Sometimes a limited personal narrative derives from a difficult childhood. If you felt your parents were not there for you, you had switched to survival mode. Instead of exploring your surroundings with interest and playfulness, you have become overly alert. You wanted certainty and clear answers to stay safe, you are afraid of failure as a sign of unworthiness. You said to yourself that if you make mistakes that means you were stupid and a fool so you avoided taking risks. This kept you small and stopped you from achieving more. Often the nagging voice in your head is nothing but an extension of your past authority figures. If you've been told that you can't do certain things or find your parents too scared, you might take on an anxiety-filled inner story. To change your narrative or story means to challenge that internal voice and make a new voice of your own. You do this by uncovering proofs for supporting your newly made story. Make a list of achievements to demonstrate that you are capable of doing hard things. Enlist the risks which you took and that you overcame. You can even remember the defeats that assisted you in getting through and what you have learned from the same defeats.

Create a cohesive story of your past

Changing your story requires you to understand your past. This means telling the truth about what happened and refusing to make excuses for parents or careers that don’t fulfill your desires. It's not to condemn your parents, you might have heard that you need to understand or pardon them because they have been trying their best. But this is not the question. When you tell yourself a story about your childhood that is wrong or false, you refrain from healing, making your narrative more complicated and tough. You can even create an illness in your body when you refuse to admit your true feelings which means it is important for you to stop sugarcoating your past. Adult children with traumatic childhoods often paint a faulty picture of a happy family to protect themselves from the hurting truth. You cling to the view of your parents as loving and protective even when they infrequently show love or protection.

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